


Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

by orphan_account



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Break Up, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:15:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24075043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Steve and Tony take their shot...and it doesn't go the way anyone thought.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 1
Kudos: 29





	Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

“So you and Stark, huh?” Natasha sips her drink, studying Steve’s face carefully over the rim, her face doesn’t shift an inch at his bright smile. 

“Yeah. Yeah, me and Tony.” Steve keeps his voice down despite being the only ones in the kitchen. 

Natasha carefully sets down her drink and dabs her mouth with a napkin, expression unchanging. 

“I know, I know he’s not your favorite person-”

“I never said that.” She says smoothly. 

“You didn’t have to.” Steve’s smile falls and he starts picking at the label on his beer bottle. 

Natasha studies her friend carefully calculating her next move. She’s only ever had one real friend before and he and Steve were nothing alike. They both had incredible minds for combat but when it came to personal relationships, Clint plays things close to the chest, Steve wears his heart on his sleeve. But they were both predictable. She could not, however, say the same thing for Tony Stark. That made her nervous. 

“I just-” she starts, searching for a more delicate phrasing than *I’m always right*, “I usually have a good sense for these things.”

“Well maybe you’re wrong?” Steve says perking up. 

“Yeah, maybe.” She smiles the way she was taught and raises her glass, “To you and Tony.”

“To me and Tony,” He knocks his drink against hers, “Thank you, Natasha.” 

~

Tony, for the first time in his life, felt like he was actually inching towards happiness. True, bright, fulfilling happiness. He felt like an ass when it all came crumbling down. He should have seen it coming. Steve isn’t yelling at him. Steve never yells, really. He just gets...stern. Tony thought he’d rather have Steve yell than keep giving him that look.

“Do you understand what I’m saying Tony?” Steve asks as if he were a child that was just caught coloring on the walls. 

“Not really, no.” Tony admits, sliding his hands into the pockets of his jeans so Steve wouldn’t see how badly he was shaking. “What I’m getting, is that you haven’t been listening to me the last ten months…”

Steve takes a moment to respond, “What do you mean?” 

“I mean, I’ve never kept it a secret from you that I had no desire to continue with the Avengers.” He said it matter of factly, rolling back on his heels. “And quite frankly, I never thought you’d want to either.”

“What made you think that?” Steve asks, looking less certain of himself now.

Tony shrugs, “I don’t know. I guess I thought you’d want to settle down, too.” 

“I think maybe I thought that too.” Steve answers sadly. “But I can’t, I can’t just not fight. It’s all I’ve ever done.”

Tony swallows the lump in his throat, “Okay. Okay then. Uh that’s it then isn’t it? Wow okay, uh just...stay as long as you need -”

“Tony, what do you mean that’s it, we can discuss this.” Steve tries to reach out to him but Tony takes several steps back, making his way to the stairs. 

Tony sticks his hand out, wordlessly asking Steve to keep his distance. “I know how this ends. I’ve been through it before.” He pauses on the third step and turns to Steve, making sure to keep his face expressionless. “Uh like I said, you can stay in the guest room until you find someone else to stay with. You could call Nat or Sam... they might be able to help you out, probably.” He runs his hand roughly over his mouth, to keep himself from rambling anymore. He risks one more glance at Steve, who looks like he wants to say more but Tony feels like he’s going to vomit. “Right.” He says, and ascends the stairs, not looking back. 

1 month later

"This is the last time" Steve pants into the other man's hair, his lips slick from open mouthed kisses. Tony’s kissing and licking his neck, while his calloused hands work their way up Steve's shirt impatiently. 

"Uh huh, right whatever you say boss. Arms up."

Steve obeys and raises his arms above his head. God they couldn't even make it to the bedroom this time. Steve’s pinned against the back of the couch, Tony's hips rocking against his cock, making his eyes roll back. Tony pulls away to slip his shirt off before working his mouth down Steve's chest. "Tony, ah fuck." Steve moans, biting his lip. "Wait, Tony I'm serious ah!"

Tony mouths Steve dick through his gym shorts. "Of course, Steve." Tony roughly pulls down his shorts and underwear. "Just one last blow job."

~  
2 more months...

Steve and Natasha are in Steve’s favorite hole in the wall bar. The lighting was terrible and the bartender was a grumpy old prick but they had a hell of a home brew. It reminded him of the stuff he and Bucky would swipe from the local breweries in Brooklyn. 

"So are you seeing anyone new yet?" Natasha asks, sipping her drink. 

Steve's head snaps up, he'd been reading a new text from Tony, 

Come to the tower tonight.  
I’ve got a new upgrade for your phone. 

"No, not really. I don't really get a chance to meet new people." He kept his head down as he typed back a reply, 

Phones fine Tony.

Natasha raises an eyebrow when she catches a glimpse at Steve’s phone screen, "I didn't know you and Tony still texted so casually." She took a sip from her beer letting the glass hide the way her eyes studied Steve. 

His cheeks immediately turn red and of course his phone went off again. 

Uh no it’s not. I should know I designed it. 

"It's nothing like that, we're friends” Steve answers. “Couples can be friends after they break up, Natasha."

"Sure they can. Usually takes longer than a month after breaking up.” Natasha had been Steve’s first call that night. She wishes she could say she hadn’t been waiting for a call like that since the beginning. But this, this is something she never saw coming. 

“Well Tony and I are different.” Steve tucks away his phone without replying and finishes his drink in three long gulps.

Natasha gave him the smile he knew wasn’t real, “Yeah, maybe you are.” 

~

“Tony?” Steve let’s himself into Tony’s workshop like he’d done so many times before. He wonders if he should have knocked because they’re not dating anymore and it’s probably inappropriate to just waltz in. Natasha’s comments from earlier ring in his head. Suddenly, he feels incredibly awkward bringing his ex boyfriend tacos from his favorite food truck. 

“Oh sweet, you brought me Ringo’s.” Tony snatches the bag out of Steve’s hands and without warning digs into Steve’s front pocket. 

“Tony-” Steve startles. 

“Relax,” Tony smirks and waves Steve’s phone in his face, “besides it’s not like that’s, er, uncharted territory for me.” He shamelessly runs his eyes down Steve’s body before pivoting and sauntering away. 

Steve rolls his eyes but can’t help the small smile that dances on his lips. He easily catches up to Tony who’s now walking and shoving half a taco in his mouth. “Yes but don’t you think that’s a little...inappropriate since we’re, ya know, not together?” 

Tony drops the paper bag on his desk and turns to face him, “Uh, yeah boss, we moved past inappropriate a quickie and two blow jobs ago.” 

Steve grimaces because he knew that his cheeks turned a little pink.

Tony reaches forward and grabs Steve by the shoulders, “Steve, it’s really not that uncommon in this century to casually hook up with someone.” 

Steve takes a beat. He knows hook up culture. It really wasn’t that uncommon back in his day either, it’s just that no one ever talked about it and he was never interested in that kind of relationship. “Is that what you want?” Steve asks. 

“If it’s what you want.” 

Steve’s head hangs and he gently pushes Tony’s hands off his shoulders. “We were together Tony. That’s what I want.” 

Tony answers back in that clipped and detached way that Steve hates, “And I told you that I was done with that life- the Avengers, all of it.” 

“Including me.” Steve offers him a stale smile, eyes trained on the floor. 

“It doesn’t, uh, have to mean that.” Tony says wringing his hands together. 

“So what are you saying? You want me to leave the Avengers?” Steve pauses, eyes closed. He felt a headache coming on. “I, I can’t have this conversation again, Tony. I’ll pick up my phone tomorrow.” Steve turns and left the workshop without another word. 

~

To no one’s surprise Steve does not go back for his phone the next day. After three days of waiting Tony mails the phone back to him. No note. Steve feels like shit and everyone notices. He’s on his tenth mile when Sam catches up and tugs on his arm. 

“Okay, running man, you need a break.” Sam pants leading Steve to a bench a couple a feet away. 

“We should cool down first.” Steve says cooly. 

“We’ll cool down on this nice bench. Come on, I’ve been chasing you for the last twenty minutes trying to catch up.” Sam admits, gripping a cramp on his side. 

Steve winces. “Geez, I’m sorry. I guess I’m lost in my head a little today.” He reaches out to try and help his friend sit down but Sam bats him away. 

“Yeah, no kidding. What’s on your mind?” Sam asks, dropping down onto the bench. 

Steve paces the space in front of him. “It’s nothing.” 

“Come on man talk to me. We’ve been over this, talking helps.” Sam pushes, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. 

Steve sighs and finally lowers himself onto the bench with Sam. “It’s Tony." Does he really want to talk about this with Sam? God, he doesn't want to talk about this with anyone. But he needs advice and Sam has never been anything but honest with him. "We’ve been sleeping together. Well, we were.” 

Sam pauses, choosing his next words carefully, “I thought you guys broke up?”

“We did.” Steve admits. “But we kept seeing each other. Old habits, I guess.” 

Sam scoffs, “That’s a dangerous game.”

Steve sighs, “Tell me about it.” 

“Why’d you guys break up anyways? Not that I didn’t see it coming-hey don’t give me that look man, I was honest with you about that relationship from the very beginning.” 

“I know, I know and you know I’m grateful.” Steve waits because he doesn’t want to admit that everyone was right. Tony is immature and selfish on the surface, yes but that’s not what broke them up and that’s what broke Steve’s heart. “I know he’s not your favorite person, Sam. I know Natasha doesn’t trust him and I know Fury breathes easier now that he’s just a consultant.” He takes a deep breath trying to relieve some of the pressure in his chest. “Underneath the bravado he’s a good man. A great man. We just wanted different things. He wants to settle down, I don’t think I’m ready yet.”

That’s definitely not what Sam was expecting. He’d been patient with Steve, who kept the break up close to his chest. He’d run a thousand reasons why Tony and Steve do not work together through his head and that was never one. “Well there is a pretty significant age difference if you think about it man. It makes sense. You guys are in completely different places in your lives.” 

Steve nods solemnly, “You’re right.” He swallows down the lump in his throat. “But I still care.” 

Sam sighs and pats his friends back, “Of course you do. But if I were you, I’d stay away. Take a clean break and actually give yourself a chance to get over him.”

“You’re right.” Steve stands, “You’re right. Come on,” he nudges Sam’s sneaker, “let’s keep going.”

Sam whines, "Jesus man I'm not the energizer bunny you gotta give me a minute." 

~  
Two weeks later...

After a couple rounds with Nat and Thor, who decided to pay him a visit, Steve stumbles into his apartment a little tipsy. He collapses onto his couch, face smushed into one of those decorative pillows that he hates but Sam insists “pull the room together”. He doesn’t know what makes him do it..no that’s a lie he knows. That special stuff that Thor brings with him from Asgard, makes him dig into his pocket for his StarkPhone. He clicks on Tony’s name and texts him, 

Wanna come over? 

Steve doesn’t think a full minute passes before he receives a reply, 

You sure?

Yes. 

~  
Thirty minutes later Tony is sauntering through Steve’s apartment for the first time. “How is it that we dated for ten months and I’ve never been to your place?”

Steve’s place is open, modest, and ridiculously clean. Nothing is decorative, everything has purpose, and is only for that single purpose. Except for the throw pillows. Those are red and floral and definitely not Steve’s decision. 

Steve laughs, “We barely left your penthouse.” 

Tony laughs with him and it’s nice and light and fills Steve up with warmth.

“No we did not.” Tony makes his way to Steve’s couch and immediately reels back, face scrunching in disgust, “Woah buddy you’ve been hanging out with Thor haven’t you.” 

Steve’s smile grew, “How’d you know?” He blinks slowly to keep the room from spinning so much. It doesn’t quite do the trick but Steve finds his balance enough to lean forward and run his hands up Tony’s thighs. 

“Oh, boy -ah, just a lucky guess.” Tony grabs Steve’s hands just as they brush over his zipper. “Hey, how ‘bout we getcha to bed.” Tony didn’t wait for Steve to reply before throwing Steve’s arm over his shoulder and hauling him to his feet. 

“Yeah, yeah that sounds like a good idea.” Steve wraps both of his arms around Tony’s shoulders. He starts kissing across his jaw but Tony pulls away and Steve whines.

Tony drops Steve onto his bed before his does something stupid. Then moves to take off his shoes and socks. Steve starts running his hands through Tony’s hair. “Uh, that’s probably not a good idea right now boss.” 

“I like when you call me boss.” Steve supplies unhelpfully. 

Tony’s mouth drops open and clicks shut, biting back his words. “Right. Steve, come on. Arms up.” 

Steve tries but his arms feel like jello and he can't keep his eyes open anymore. He feels Tony's nimble and familiar fingers tug his shirt up and off before his head spins right onto his pillow. 

~ 

Tony's too embarrassed to call Happy for a ride back so he calls Rhodes instead. 

Forty minutes later they're back at the tower nursing three fingers of whisky. 

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Rhodey tiptoes carefully onto the subject that Tony has kept tight lipped about the whole way home. 

"No." Tony downs his drink, "Yes. I mean I just expected more from Captain fuckin’ America" 

Rhodey scoffs and sips the auburn liquid, "So you can booty call him, he just can't booty call you?" 

"Exactly!" 

"Do you hear yourself, Tones?" 

"What! What's the big deal? I'm allowed to be upset! He's the one who cut things off, I did what he wanted, I stayed away." 

"I know Tony and you need to keep doing that, understand? Don't go stomping up his doorstep tomorrow ready to give a piece of your mind cause you'll end up given something else." He finished off his drink while Tony gaped at him.

"Excuse you, I have excellent self control." 

Rhodes raises a single eyebrow at him. 

“Okay fine no I don’t.”

“It sucks, man, I know it does. But the harder you guys hold onto each other the more it’s gonna hurt.” 

Tony stares at his glass and he knows Rhodey is right. Cap was a pipe dream anyway. But he can’t help but grimace at the tight feeling in his chest when he thinks that because he really thought he had it. The whole package. Someone to love, who not just tolerated him but understood him, and loved him. 

“Hey.” Rhodey interrupts his thoughts, “I love you, man and you’re gonna be okay.” 

Tony can’t help but smile and throws an arm across his best friend’s shoulders forcing him into an awkward side hug, “Come here you big lug.” 

~  
Three months pass and the memory of Tony’s hands putting Steve to bed are starting to fade. He’s still in his dreams every night but Natasha and Sam say it’ll pass with time. Sometimes his hands itch to text the man but he always catches himself. There hasn’t been an Avengers level threat in those three months and he’s grateful for that too. He has a history of being distracted by the people he loves on the field. 

Steve never doubted he loves Tony, he thinks a part of him always will. But Steve can’t stop fighting, he was born for this. He’d never be able to sit idly by in a cabin by the lake. Tony deserves more than to be stuck waiting at home, always wondering if he’s coming home. 

It’s for the best.

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this about a year ago. Then I started dating someone. That someone dumped me three months ago. I found this fic in my google docs, I had completely forgotten about it. It's kind of crazy how similar the feelings and situation I started writing about a year ago are to my current situation. A year ago I wanted this fic to have a happy ending. Coming back to it, it felt impossible. So I used it to work through some of my own feelings. Anyways, I hope someone else enjoys my sad break up story. Also I'm sorry if it makes you sad! But sometimes we just need to let ourselves feel sad. Much love! I welcome kudos and comments.


End file.
